“Nostalgia can be a real bitch, more appropriately a bitch slap. A quick reminder that time never stands still anywhere within your own mind. Love will be had and lost wherever you turn. The good love that you will miss, the bad love that you’ll regret, and that bittersweet love that you will swallow with appreciation. Lingering memories will stay with you no matter how much you fling to forget… the are cinched up in the fabric of your being. Scarring and marring you for future indulgences. Some will play it safe and learn from the bad while moving on with the good. The few that choose otherwise explore the strange world through passionate eyes, embracing a new surprise at every turn. Let those slaps sting and swell as it will act as your tide to new lands.”— sting and swell as it will act as your tide
I must remind myself to not be selfish. Selfishly wanting to see and talk to you again. Selfishly racking my mind to hold on to the moments we shared that seemed too good for there to be a last. It’s a cliche to say you brought more joy into the world than others… but it’s true. Every moment I shared with you was sincere and for those few moments I had the opportunity to connect with one of the worlds most beautiful souls. Whether we were comparing our shabby Vans or listening to some music in the safety of closed doors, it was those special moments that make you infinite in my mind. With the loss of you I’m reminded to take every moment in with every fiber of my being, to be kind and gentle, never to give any fucks, and however fleeting our time is, it’s the quality of that time spent that remains infinite. This is going to be hard…. I want to go back to those times and embrace the shit out of you… I want to remember every detail vividly… I want to know that you exist in this silly world. Your life touched me in ways I can never describe in words. Thank you; for I feel truly grateful for all that is you, the infinite beauty you bestowed on the world. Take it to the max my friend. You are sorely missed. You will live infinitely in all the beauty I see. Love you!